Here in Finland, as well as in Sweden, we celebrate Father's Day today.
And no, my Hubby is not MY Father, but he is our children's Father, so since this is my blog, and I blog what I want to, this one goes to him.
I know I gush about my Big Guy a lot.
Well. If he was yours you'd know why :)
This last week and a half, he has again shown his love to me and the kids.
He has cried along with me. Soothed the kids those 1st hard nights after finding out that Star had died.
He went to their rooms in the evening, and talked with them. Hugged them. Cried with them.
He thought nothing of it. I pointed out to him that all guys are not like that. Many guys would not have done that. He looked puzzled at me...
To him it was the most natural thing.
And I'm so thankful that's how he feels.
I think it's so important to be able to show your feelings. To SHARE your feelings.
Most of us women are OK at doing this. Many guys are not.
Too bad.
I can't imagine how hard it must be for guys who feel that they need to "stay strong" and bottle their feelings inside themselves.
Maybe they get it out through work, going to the gym, whatever....
But I still think that showing your feelings is nessesary in order to heal and move forward.
Last night Big Guy said something that I totally agree with.
He said that he'd rather go through the trial of losing Star, knowing that we have a baby waiting for us, than not have it happen at all.
So, so true.
It puts it all in it's right perspective.
We still did get a baby. We still did get a gift from above. We have a baby we never have to worry about.
From this trial love has grown.
From this trial people have shown their best side.
Have you ever thought about that??
That the hardest times bring out the best in people??
I don't ask for hardship in my life, but when it comes along, and you realize the love and strength that comes out of it...
It's truly amazing!
I'm happy to have Big Guy at my side going through this.
He's.... well... the best.
Thank you for being such a wonderful Father to our kids.
Thank you for being you.
Life is beautiful when you have so much good in your life.
Thank you to our Heavenly Father, who provides so well for us... Without him, we would be nothing.
Showing posts with label thankfulness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thankfulness. Show all posts
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
What's the problem???
Don't we all have bad days at times? Days when we wonder how our lives turned out the way it did. Why am I doing this? Why does he have a better job, a faster car, more money etc? Yes, that's perfectly common and I believe normal.
What I don't get is when young, healthy, able bodied people are complaining about their lives, making it sound like everything is somebody elses fault.
"I hate my job, I get paid crap, nobody understands me, I try to please everybody, but when I turn my back they take advantage of me and leave me in the dust" Whine whine and more whine.
I think some people need to give their heads a good shake and take a hard look in the mirror.
First of all, if you truly hate your job, why don't you change it??? Can you retrain in something? Take a course? Who are you benefitting if your work really suck? Have you asked your boss if you can make your tasks more interesting or challenging? How?
Remember, no one will come and thank you for putting up with things you didn't like.
You will not get a medal or great friends along the way.
You'll get bitter, bored, and the people who hang out with you are most likely suffering the same problems. And you tear each other down, and steal each others energy.
I have a feeling that some people might thrive on complaining. The job itself is not the true problem.
Of course there are times when we have to hold on to a job in order to put food on the table and keep a roof over our heads, and maybe going to this job isn't just thrilling fun, but do you ever stop and concider your options? Good or bad.
If I didn't have this job, would I be better off unemployed?
Do you ever take a minute and remember what your grandparents did in the past, during the depression, just to keep their families alive? Are we becoming spoiled with the opportunities of being able to pick and choose? Think about your boss that hired you, and you feel no gratitude towards that person... Is that right?
I'm a strong believer in being thankful for what you have, instead of missing what you don't.
In doing things for yourself, not expecting others to serve you.
Rather serve others.
If you are unhappy at work, and just can't do anything to change it at the moment, how can you change your sparetime to make that time more fulfilling?
Do you know elderly who you can help out? Run errands, mow the lawn, clean their home?
Do you know families with young children that might appreaciate a helping hand?
If you fill your sparetime with helping others, with a smile on your face and without expecting anything back, maybe your life will become fuller, and your job might even become a bit easier to handle?
At least you know that at the end of the day there might be somebody waiting for you to show up, to help them out.
We all have one life to live, and we choose ourselves how this time is spent.
You can not blame others for how things turned out.
Some people have gone through some really hard times, because of how others have treated them, but at some time we all need to realize that
"I am me now. My happiness is my own matter. What's past is past, what is done is done, but now I will surround myself with people who give me good energy, who are positive, and I myself am going to try to be my own best friend."
If you like who you are, and feel that you'd be your own friend, then being alone and being bored isn't so bad, at least you are in good company!!
When you point fingers and say
"I trusted that person, and he or she failed me, I'll never forgive them!",
you become bitter and full of hatered, and the only person that you truly wreck is yourself.
People will turn their backs, because you are stealing their energy.
And if you're not happy with yourself, why would others be?
You need to love yourself in order to be loved, and being able to love others.
This is not cliche', this is truly how it is.
"A bitter person was never thankful, and a thankful person was never bitter"
Good words to live by.
Even if we have days that feel less than good or fun, at least when we carry a thankful heart, we can go to bed feeling content with how life is, good and bad, and if we feel a need to change, we know the ball is in our own court!
What I don't get is when young, healthy, able bodied people are complaining about their lives, making it sound like everything is somebody elses fault.
"I hate my job, I get paid crap, nobody understands me, I try to please everybody, but when I turn my back they take advantage of me and leave me in the dust" Whine whine and more whine.
I think some people need to give their heads a good shake and take a hard look in the mirror.
First of all, if you truly hate your job, why don't you change it??? Can you retrain in something? Take a course? Who are you benefitting if your work really suck? Have you asked your boss if you can make your tasks more interesting or challenging? How?
Remember, no one will come and thank you for putting up with things you didn't like.
You will not get a medal or great friends along the way.
You'll get bitter, bored, and the people who hang out with you are most likely suffering the same problems. And you tear each other down, and steal each others energy.
I have a feeling that some people might thrive on complaining. The job itself is not the true problem.
Of course there are times when we have to hold on to a job in order to put food on the table and keep a roof over our heads, and maybe going to this job isn't just thrilling fun, but do you ever stop and concider your options? Good or bad.
If I didn't have this job, would I be better off unemployed?
Do you ever take a minute and remember what your grandparents did in the past, during the depression, just to keep their families alive? Are we becoming spoiled with the opportunities of being able to pick and choose? Think about your boss that hired you, and you feel no gratitude towards that person... Is that right?
I'm a strong believer in being thankful for what you have, instead of missing what you don't.
In doing things for yourself, not expecting others to serve you.
Rather serve others.
If you are unhappy at work, and just can't do anything to change it at the moment, how can you change your sparetime to make that time more fulfilling?
Do you know elderly who you can help out? Run errands, mow the lawn, clean their home?
Do you know families with young children that might appreaciate a helping hand?
If you fill your sparetime with helping others, with a smile on your face and without expecting anything back, maybe your life will become fuller, and your job might even become a bit easier to handle?
At least you know that at the end of the day there might be somebody waiting for you to show up, to help them out.
We all have one life to live, and we choose ourselves how this time is spent.
You can not blame others for how things turned out.
Some people have gone through some really hard times, because of how others have treated them, but at some time we all need to realize that
"I am me now. My happiness is my own matter. What's past is past, what is done is done, but now I will surround myself with people who give me good energy, who are positive, and I myself am going to try to be my own best friend."
If you like who you are, and feel that you'd be your own friend, then being alone and being bored isn't so bad, at least you are in good company!!
When you point fingers and say
"I trusted that person, and he or she failed me, I'll never forgive them!",
you become bitter and full of hatered, and the only person that you truly wreck is yourself.
People will turn their backs, because you are stealing their energy.
And if you're not happy with yourself, why would others be?
You need to love yourself in order to be loved, and being able to love others.
This is not cliche', this is truly how it is.
"A bitter person was never thankful, and a thankful person was never bitter"
Good words to live by.
Even if we have days that feel less than good or fun, at least when we carry a thankful heart, we can go to bed feeling content with how life is, good and bad, and if we feel a need to change, we know the ball is in our own court!
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Thankful
I'm sitting up late as usual, letting my thoughts trail in whatever directions they decide to take off. During the day my mind is so occupied with the busyness of running this show as smoothly as possible... so it's nice to have some alonetime to think and reflect.
I don't feel that I have had enough time to reflect for a while now... like for the last 15 years?? Being a mom of 1, 2 or more kids changes your life, and my mind is most of the time cought up in the care of our 7. We plan, we prepare, we act. In small ways and big ways.
This last year has been so increadilby full of happenings, that I truly feel I could write a book about it! And as I take a second to look back, I realize how good it's been, and how much I have to be thankful for. It's so easy to take for granted all the good in life, but every now and then something reminds you of how much you have to be thankful for.
The fact that me and my whole famliy is reasonable healthy, that we are safe and happy. How easy to take it all for granted.
This past week many, many young people lost their lives at the hands of a sick man, in Oslo, Norway. My niece was a very short distance away from where the bomb went off in down-town Oslo. She is unharmed and made it back to her hometown safe and sound, but severly shocked.
I'm thankful that she's OK, and also that I live in a safe country where on a regular basis I should have nothing to fear. It's scary though how these attacks are becoming more common, also in areas of the world where you normally don't have to worry. I pray that I will always will be prepared, and never unprepared to face whatever might come, that way I don't have to be scared or live in fear.
We are all enjoying our new house so much, and tomorrow my brother with wife and little son are coming for a visit all the way from the US westcoast! Also our 2nd oldest daughter's BFF and her great aunt will be arriving from Michigan!! How wonderful to have family and friends come to visit us from way over there! I'm excited to show our house to them all, but mostly I'm excited to let them see how well we are doing and how happy we are here! Moving across the ocean and starting all over is a huge step, and to hop on the next flight back is not an option, so being happy and content here is something we are very thankful for.
I'm looking forward to spend another year here, and to see what excitement it will bring! My personal goal is to strengthen my Finnish! I feel like my brain has finally landed and that I have a bit more energy to focus on the language, compared to last year when everything was new and so much needed to be done in such a short amount of time!! Wish me luck! and yeah... I still need to get a camera so that I can take some pictures of our house, that I can post for you all to see! Tudelu for now!
I don't feel that I have had enough time to reflect for a while now... like for the last 15 years?? Being a mom of 1, 2 or more kids changes your life, and my mind is most of the time cought up in the care of our 7. We plan, we prepare, we act. In small ways and big ways.
This last year has been so increadilby full of happenings, that I truly feel I could write a book about it! And as I take a second to look back, I realize how good it's been, and how much I have to be thankful for. It's so easy to take for granted all the good in life, but every now and then something reminds you of how much you have to be thankful for.
The fact that me and my whole famliy is reasonable healthy, that we are safe and happy. How easy to take it all for granted.
This past week many, many young people lost their lives at the hands of a sick man, in Oslo, Norway. My niece was a very short distance away from where the bomb went off in down-town Oslo. She is unharmed and made it back to her hometown safe and sound, but severly shocked.
I'm thankful that she's OK, and also that I live in a safe country where on a regular basis I should have nothing to fear. It's scary though how these attacks are becoming more common, also in areas of the world where you normally don't have to worry. I pray that I will always will be prepared, and never unprepared to face whatever might come, that way I don't have to be scared or live in fear.
We are all enjoying our new house so much, and tomorrow my brother with wife and little son are coming for a visit all the way from the US westcoast! Also our 2nd oldest daughter's BFF and her great aunt will be arriving from Michigan!! How wonderful to have family and friends come to visit us from way over there! I'm excited to show our house to them all, but mostly I'm excited to let them see how well we are doing and how happy we are here! Moving across the ocean and starting all over is a huge step, and to hop on the next flight back is not an option, so being happy and content here is something we are very thankful for.
I'm looking forward to spend another year here, and to see what excitement it will bring! My personal goal is to strengthen my Finnish! I feel like my brain has finally landed and that I have a bit more energy to focus on the language, compared to last year when everything was new and so much needed to be done in such a short amount of time!! Wish me luck! and yeah... I still need to get a camera so that I can take some pictures of our house, that I can post for you all to see! Tudelu for now!
Friday, May 13, 2011
I can't wait!!!
Have you ever felt this way? You just can't wait for... "___" fill in the blank.
Well, I have this little calender that gives you a thoughtful phrase each day, and this one really made me think
"Long foretold, long last; short notice, soon past"
I think this really goes hand in hand with todays instant gratification thinking. If you look back at the moments in your life that really stand out, were they things that you planned and longed for during a while, or was it the spur of the moment events? I definitely know that it's all the things I longed, waited and hoped for that stand out.
For example; getting my 1st place of my own. I can still clearly remember the 1st night spent in my 1st apartment. Was everything "just right" and perfect? No. But this was something I had waited for and looked forward to for some years (I was 19 when I moved away from home) As I laid in the tiny student apartment, surrounded by boxes filled with my childhood and future... I was in awe of the feeling of being "on my own!".
3 years later I had another one of those moments, standing in front of that old stone church, lovingly looking at the tall and handsome guy at my side, thinking "So this is who I dreamed of all my life!" (I'm sure most little girls hold pretend weddings getting married to Mr.Right) Will I ever forget these moments??? No. Why? Because I had time to long for, wait, pray, dream and hope before they happened.
The same goes for the births of all our children. Those 9 months sure gives you time for all those feelings too... And you'll never ever forget the birth of a child, no matter how many you have! All I have to do is to think of any of them, and I can recall their labours and births no problem. Looking back to my childhood I can recall a few of my most treasured toys, and guess what? They are all items I had time to wish and long for.
Sadly, often today it is quite different for kids as well as grownups. Credit cards have helped erase the opportunity to wish for things. "Just swipe the card mom!" (then I can get what I want...) Big trips, new furniture, electronical gadgets, and the latest toys, all become "musts" at THIS moment.
How sad!!
I think you rob yourself and your kids from the true experience of recieving and appreciating if we don't allow ourselves to say "Wait!", "If it's special enough you'll be able to wait until christmas, your birthday, when you have saved up enough money..., and then when you finally get it! Oh boy will it be special!" Or maybe not. Maybe the novelty wore off faster than it took to walk to the car... in which case you have saved not only a dent on your bankaccount, but also the risk of spoiling yourself or your kid.
Building our house tests me in many areas... It's so easy to get carried away with "I wants!" I really try to limit the things I'm standing firm on. Like the 2sided fireplace. It will be almost 2 years since we 1st designed our house, and the idea popped into my mind "Hey, wouldn't it be neat to have a fireplace where I can see the fire from the livingroom and kitchen?" We were building one no matter what, and with my cousin building it for us, we are saving on costs, so in the end I'll get my 2sided one for a really good deal. Will I enjoy it?? You bet. Same goes for the idea of having laundry abilities on both floors. I debated if it made sense to have our laundry up or downstairs... when I realized that we could do both!! Again, the only extra cost is another washer, which in the big scheme of things is a rather humble amount, but what convenience it will be to have that extra machine on a daily basis!
When we move in I will have to be good at waiting again. Of course I will want to get everything "just right" as soon as possible, but I know it will take time and money to achieve this. I will be a frequent visitor to all the 2nd hand shops, looking unusually maniac like, digging for gold...
And maybe one day I will stand in our house and look around and say
"Wow! It's done! The journey was long, but man was it worth it, and will I ever enjoy it!"
Then we'll decide to sell it and start over... ;)
Well, I have this little calender that gives you a thoughtful phrase each day, and this one really made me think
"Long foretold, long last; short notice, soon past"
I think this really goes hand in hand with todays instant gratification thinking. If you look back at the moments in your life that really stand out, were they things that you planned and longed for during a while, or was it the spur of the moment events? I definitely know that it's all the things I longed, waited and hoped for that stand out.
For example; getting my 1st place of my own. I can still clearly remember the 1st night spent in my 1st apartment. Was everything "just right" and perfect? No. But this was something I had waited for and looked forward to for some years (I was 19 when I moved away from home) As I laid in the tiny student apartment, surrounded by boxes filled with my childhood and future... I was in awe of the feeling of being "on my own!".
3 years later I had another one of those moments, standing in front of that old stone church, lovingly looking at the tall and handsome guy at my side, thinking "So this is who I dreamed of all my life!" (I'm sure most little girls hold pretend weddings getting married to Mr.Right) Will I ever forget these moments??? No. Why? Because I had time to long for, wait, pray, dream and hope before they happened.
The same goes for the births of all our children. Those 9 months sure gives you time for all those feelings too... And you'll never ever forget the birth of a child, no matter how many you have! All I have to do is to think of any of them, and I can recall their labours and births no problem. Looking back to my childhood I can recall a few of my most treasured toys, and guess what? They are all items I had time to wish and long for.
Sadly, often today it is quite different for kids as well as grownups. Credit cards have helped erase the opportunity to wish for things. "Just swipe the card mom!" (then I can get what I want...) Big trips, new furniture, electronical gadgets, and the latest toys, all become "musts" at THIS moment.
How sad!!
I think you rob yourself and your kids from the true experience of recieving and appreciating if we don't allow ourselves to say "Wait!", "If it's special enough you'll be able to wait until christmas, your birthday, when you have saved up enough money..., and then when you finally get it! Oh boy will it be special!" Or maybe not. Maybe the novelty wore off faster than it took to walk to the car... in which case you have saved not only a dent on your bankaccount, but also the risk of spoiling yourself or your kid.
Building our house tests me in many areas... It's so easy to get carried away with "I wants!" I really try to limit the things I'm standing firm on. Like the 2sided fireplace. It will be almost 2 years since we 1st designed our house, and the idea popped into my mind "Hey, wouldn't it be neat to have a fireplace where I can see the fire from the livingroom and kitchen?" We were building one no matter what, and with my cousin building it for us, we are saving on costs, so in the end I'll get my 2sided one for a really good deal. Will I enjoy it?? You bet. Same goes for the idea of having laundry abilities on both floors. I debated if it made sense to have our laundry up or downstairs... when I realized that we could do both!! Again, the only extra cost is another washer, which in the big scheme of things is a rather humble amount, but what convenience it will be to have that extra machine on a daily basis!
When we move in I will have to be good at waiting again. Of course I will want to get everything "just right" as soon as possible, but I know it will take time and money to achieve this. I will be a frequent visitor to all the 2nd hand shops, looking unusually maniac like, digging for gold...
And maybe one day I will stand in our house and look around and say
"Wow! It's done! The journey was long, but man was it worth it, and will I ever enjoy it!"
Then we'll decide to sell it and start over... ;)
Friday, May 6, 2011
Barney got it right!
"A Thankful heart is a happy heart, be glad for what you have - it's an easy way to start!"
This familiar kid's song comes to my mind on a regular basis, because it's so true!!
If you really are thankful for what you DO have, it sure saves us from a lot of aggrevation wishing for what we don't
It's so easy to "compare up the ladder", meaning, we compare what we have (or don't) to those that seeminly have MORE! I like to "compare down"... and again and again realize how much I have!
I have a pretty impatient nature, and I'm not too keen on waiting on anything. Take a clean house for example. Well, in a family of 9 that is a continous struggle. so when I feel stressed and frustrated about the chaos, and wish that I had a magic wand that would make all the kids disappear (just for like an hour or so), so that I could clean undisturbed.... I have to stop and ask myself "Why is it so important? IF everything really was in it's right place, all projects taken care of, closets organized etc etc... then WHAT??" What is it that I want to accomplish? What goal am I reaching for? And why? To have a clean house really does matter to me, so I know that in the end, I will feel happier from that, although I have to learn to sit down and ignore the mess and just BE sometimes... My dear Hubby is good at reminding me about this. "Just relax!, then we can all clean up, and it doesn't take that long anyway!" He's of course right... but I can be stubborn...
So how does this relate to being happy with what you have?
Well, if you are always struggling to get to the next step up, and never stop and look behind and enjoy the view - so far!, what's the point of the climb?
I used to care a lot more about what "others might think".
What a waste of time!!! As long as I am not rude, ignorant or impolite to others, what do I owe them??
What if my standards are not the same as theirs? What if they are happy with less? How can somebody else dictate what's best for anybody else than themselves?
If there were no guidelines around the world for what the "norm" is... Then how would the world look? I think most of us would be happy with a lot less! And rather spend the extra time with our loved ones, than chasing the opportunity of making an extra dollar. But because media pushes us to believe that we indeed "need" the latest gadget, a bigger this and a smaller that... We think that we have to live up to that expectation, and get cought up in the race.
"The one who has the most stuff when he dies wins!" - attiude.
Makes me kind of sickish to think about actually.
I realize that different people also have very different views on what's "the basics" in life. And many many grownups these days walk around with a "I deserve this" attitude. Passing it along to their kids.
It has to be the latest and greatest and highest quality... and then when they have it, they somehow think that these items make them "more" than others!!!
If you really had to face the option to lose either all your money and stuff or your loved ones... I sure hope this would be a very easy choice. So why do so many people act the opposite way?
"When I have made this much money, and got to this or that status level, THEN I'm gonna take my family on the vacation of their lifetime!" Why???
Did you ask your kids if this is what they want? What if you turn around one day and realize that "Oh! They are all grown up and I don't even know them..."
"Be glad for what you have, it's an easy way to start!"
PS: One more thing... Many people keep wishing that they were somebody else, or had somebody elses life, but when it really really comes down to it, most of us would end up choosing our own shoes after all...
This familiar kid's song comes to my mind on a regular basis, because it's so true!!
If you really are thankful for what you DO have, it sure saves us from a lot of aggrevation wishing for what we don't
It's so easy to "compare up the ladder", meaning, we compare what we have (or don't) to those that seeminly have MORE! I like to "compare down"... and again and again realize how much I have!
I have a pretty impatient nature, and I'm not too keen on waiting on anything. Take a clean house for example. Well, in a family of 9 that is a continous struggle. so when I feel stressed and frustrated about the chaos, and wish that I had a magic wand that would make all the kids disappear (just for like an hour or so), so that I could clean undisturbed.... I have to stop and ask myself "Why is it so important? IF everything really was in it's right place, all projects taken care of, closets organized etc etc... then WHAT??" What is it that I want to accomplish? What goal am I reaching for? And why? To have a clean house really does matter to me, so I know that in the end, I will feel happier from that, although I have to learn to sit down and ignore the mess and just BE sometimes... My dear Hubby is good at reminding me about this. "Just relax!, then we can all clean up, and it doesn't take that long anyway!" He's of course right... but I can be stubborn...
So how does this relate to being happy with what you have?
Well, if you are always struggling to get to the next step up, and never stop and look behind and enjoy the view - so far!, what's the point of the climb?
I used to care a lot more about what "others might think".
What a waste of time!!! As long as I am not rude, ignorant or impolite to others, what do I owe them??
What if my standards are not the same as theirs? What if they are happy with less? How can somebody else dictate what's best for anybody else than themselves?
If there were no guidelines around the world for what the "norm" is... Then how would the world look? I think most of us would be happy with a lot less! And rather spend the extra time with our loved ones, than chasing the opportunity of making an extra dollar. But because media pushes us to believe that we indeed "need" the latest gadget, a bigger this and a smaller that... We think that we have to live up to that expectation, and get cought up in the race.
"The one who has the most stuff when he dies wins!" - attiude.
Makes me kind of sickish to think about actually.
I realize that different people also have very different views on what's "the basics" in life. And many many grownups these days walk around with a "I deserve this" attitude. Passing it along to their kids.
It has to be the latest and greatest and highest quality... and then when they have it, they somehow think that these items make them "more" than others!!!
If you really had to face the option to lose either all your money and stuff or your loved ones... I sure hope this would be a very easy choice. So why do so many people act the opposite way?
"When I have made this much money, and got to this or that status level, THEN I'm gonna take my family on the vacation of their lifetime!" Why???
Did you ask your kids if this is what they want? What if you turn around one day and realize that "Oh! They are all grown up and I don't even know them..."
"Be glad for what you have, it's an easy way to start!"
PS: One more thing... Many people keep wishing that they were somebody else, or had somebody elses life, but when it really really comes down to it, most of us would end up choosing our own shoes after all...
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